Feature Comedy | 1920 | Silent | B/W
Slapstick comedy 1920's with a Chinese theme some smoking opium of course !
Reel one. Silhouette of teenage boy (Bobby Vernon) being told off - finger wagging by policeman. Boy looks nervous and fingers collar and bites nails. Eats rim of straw boater. Policeman points at photograph of his grandfather as policeman. Both policeman and teenager and policeman take off hats (boater badly damaged). Cop points at chest. Boy shakes head. Pretty girl looks glum when Bobby explains her father has turned down his proposal. Civilian and police lieutenant shake hands. Young boy truncheons Bobby over the head - good fall. Boy whistles, dog wearing coat marked "Police Dog" emerges from vase and sniffs Bobby's face. Bobby and girl kiss. She is happy and sighs. The Policeman's Ball - Fancy dress. Dancing. Bobby dresses as cop, eyes self in shop window. Tries on mask. Twirls truncheon and walks along sidewalk. Drunk leaning in doorway sees him and smashes liquor bottle. Bobby explains his fancy dress, man faints. At Ball Bobby reveals himself to girl and friend. They applaud and laugh. Rival looks angry and drags him back. Bobby walks across road. Police wagon loads up and knocks him into air and into wagon. Tries to escape but sergeant won't let him. Bobby's rival salutes superior and strips out of fancy dress. Chinatown - wagon's appearance clears the streets. Bobby dropped off. Knocked over in melee. Sits on oil drum and ties shoelaces.
Six Chinese children put fireworks in barrel and it blows him onto windowsill where Chinese man is smoking opium pipe. Bobby gets high and inhales deeply. Thinks he can fly and jumps off. Lands on water-carrying man. Big melon from basket lands on head of opium drug smoker - covered in white goo. Carrier falls in basket and leaps off on all fours. Opium smoker throws plant pot at Bobby - he falls. Sits on fire hydrant - it spins and throws him off. Gingerly approaches it - it turns as he does. Close-up of Bobby's face. Chinese is using fire hydrant as periscope - pulls lever and soaks Bobby. Pulls lever and manhole cover disappears underground with Bobby on it. Very big room. Bobby confused and walks off.
Reel Two. Bobby stands next to Chinese Buddha statue and large Chinese man sitting in same position. Lights cigarette from candle. Accidentally lights man's beard. Puts it out with fire bucket - beard gone and man looks angrily at Bobby. Advances on Bobby who backs off with bucket on his foot. Shakes bucket off, walks backwards up staircase. Mandarin claps hands, and other Chinese pulls lever, stairs go flat and Bobby slides down. Bobby makes three more attempts to escape up stairs and fails. Fight and Bobby gets his legs round the Chinese' neck. Other Chinese pull his legs and stretch him. All fall down. Bobby's legs wobbly, but he escapes. Bobby does the same stair trick on Chinese. Chinese lose Bobby and pray to their idol (actually Bobby in disguise). Bobby with funny teeth, opens eyes one at a time and looks around. Fire offering made to Bobby. Lots of smoke, lots of praying (as in to Mecca). Bobby sneezes and teeth fall out. Bobby runs off dressed as God. One Chinese scared and jumps in laundry basket. See legs kicking out. Police car in street drops off police and girlfriend. Police chief is spun around on fire hydrant. Falls off dizzy. Bobby attacked by large Chinese Dragon made of paper emerging from box. Chinese cower afraid of dragon, mandarin realises it is Bobby dressed up. Dragon bites mandarin's nose and head. Back Bobby into corner - he falls off platform out of dragon suit into tub of boiling water. Bobby hides in vase. Dragon idol's eyes move. Men carry vase off. Throw vase off platform with Bobby in it. Mandarin descends with big curved sword. Step off manhole cover - it goes up, he gets squashed underneath it, as girl comes down. Mandarin becomes a dwarf. Takes a swipe with sword at Bobby, misses. Bobby looks perplexed - throws sword away. Bobby belly charges dwarf. Bobby and girl embrace and he pushes dwarf away. Dwarf recovers and becomes full sized again. Girl tells Bobby who turns around to find man much taller than he had thought, he wilts. Lifted up with finger under chin. Punches Chinese in belly and runs away. Hits Chinese man over head with vase. Girl looks frightened - at mercy of Chinese, but carried up on manhole cover lift to outside. Bobby breaks vase over main Chinese' head and punches him whilst in chair. Acts as Chinese man's arms and hands and directs minions onto manhole cover - they get catapulted into police wagon. Bobby and mandarin come up together handcuffed. They are separated, Chinese led away. Bobby gets girl. They kiss and disappear through manhole cover.
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